You don’t need anyone to validate your struggle. There’s nothing that you’re given that you can’t handle. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you can’t! And knowing this, there’s nothing that is going to deter you from your goals. You know what? I say, embrace the adversity. Embrace the challenge. Embrace the lies and comments made about you, because honestly, all you have to do now is work through the struggle. Don’t stress yourself out about anything else, just focus on making it through. Yes, it’s easier said than done, but when you do get through it, you’ll be all the happier and grateful that you fought such a battle in the first place!
Rather than sit around and think about those who could care less about you, get up, do something! Grab a pen, put it to paper, and get to know yourself. You’re worthy. Forget about what they say about you. They don’t live your life. They haven’t been through what you’ve been through. Don’t let anyone dictate your life. I know it’s hard, trust me, I do. When you start to feel anger, ask yourself why? Why am I angry? Why does it matter? You have a full life ahead of you, and like T.D. Jakes says “Unlock your mind. Their perception of you doesn’t matter, your perception of yourself does!”
Out of all of the books that I have read so far, all of the authors say to ask myself “Who am I?” I mean, I ask myself this question and I’m not sure on what the answer is. They say that who we think we are is dictated by our history, which is our identity, but not who we really are. I was watching an awesome interview between Oprah and India Arie, and Arie said something that struck me. She said: “You do not have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.” She left me speechless. I don’t think that I have ever thought of myself as a soul. The whole idea, or truth as it seems to be, is life shattering, but why don’t I feel it?
So I have asked myself this question more than I ever have in my life over the last couple of weeks, and I still haven’t come to any conclusion, or had any life altering epiphanies, but I thought that I’d throw this question out there to you guys. Who are you?
Have a great night. Look out for future posts!
The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer has been a great read so far. Singer talks about letting go of the external things that life throws at us, and work from within to center ourselves, which in turn can end our suffering. I have a couple of chapters left to read, but I thought I’d share a couple of profound quotes from the book with you guys.
“Who have you ever allowed directly into your true inner self without the protection of your mental buffer? Nobody, not even yourself.”
“The moment you start seeing that you don’t like the people you used to like, the moment you start seeing that your life looks really different, the moment it all starts getting negative–let go. You should have let go before, but you didn’t.”
“Be an explorer. Witness it, and then it will go (emotions).”
“It’s none of your business. Just let things go. That’s what the Self does. Awareness does not fight; awareness releases. Awareness is simply aware while everything in the universe parades before it.”
“Once you learn that it’s okay to feel inner disturbances, and that they can no longer disturb your seat of consciousness, you will be free.”
“The noise, the fear, the confusion, the constant changing of the inner energies– it can all stop.”
I have decided to spend a lot of time alone. Not with the intent to cower away from the outside world, but to actually get to know myself outside of my worries. During this time, I have also been reading in order to gain some type of perspective on life, or what we think is life. While watching a Big Sean interview on The Breakfast Club, this book The Four Agreements came up in conversation, and he talked about how this book helped him deal with a lot of negativity that was going on around him. Once the interview was over, decided to buy the book.
Don Miguel Ruiz is the author of this great book the details how simple life is, honestly. He gives his readers four agreements to live by in order to allow for us to make our lives easier. He says that we are already free, we just can’t see it. His words opened my eyes to ideas, or truths as I see them, that I always wondered about, but cowered away from in fear that I wasn’t making any sense. I will definitely be making more posts as I read more books similar to this one, but for now, here are the four agreements that Ruiz talks about.
- Be impeccable with your word– Don’t use your words to be demeaning to yourself, first and foremost, as well as others. He says, we are the biggest abusers of ourselves, because we judge our actions, and we put limits upon our capabilities. Use the word to break all those teeny, tiny agreements that make you suffer.
- Don’t take anything personally– Don’t take what others say about you personally. Most of the time, anything that someone says about you comes from their own pain and misfortune. You take it personally, because you agree with whatever was said. As soon as you agree, the poison goes through you, and you are trapped in the dream of hell.
- Don’t make assumptions- We make an assumption, we misunderstand, we take it personally, and we end up creating a whole big drama for nothing.
- Always do your best– You don’t have to be angry with yourself if you don’t keep the four agreements, just do your best. Everything is alive and changing all the time, so your best will sometimes be high quality, and other times it will not be as good.
Tyler Perry is one of my biggest inspirations. He survived a traumatic childhood, where physical, sexual, and emotional abuse were present, and beyond all expectations, he became a millionaire. In the video above, he speaks to us and tells us to believe. Believe in our dreams, and most importantly, believe in the possibility of them. He says “you have to know it beyond knowing it.” Whether you believe in a god or not, have faith in your journey. Don’t let the opinions of others stop you. Your dreams are valid, regardless of what others tell you.
On my own journey of self-discovery and mental health, there are days where I just want to give up, where I just want to go through the motions, and basically deny myself the opportunity of a better life– the way I see it. But every time this happens, something within just says keep on fighting. I started the video on the part that spoke to me the most, but you may find something else within this video that may speak to you, so I say watch it for yourself and listen for what might get you going again.
Most importantly, reignite that flame and continue to believe.
“Silence the angry man with love. Silence ill-natured man with kindness. Silence the miser with generosity. Silence the liar with truth.”- Buddha
Picture from Google- YouTube.com
Reader, close your eyes and say this to yourself every night before you go to bed.
I won’t ever doubt myself again.
No one can judge me, but me.
No one can make me feel anything that I don’t own myself.
I am awesome.
I embody pure joy!
I wasn’t put on this Earth to allow others to define me!
I carry peace, love, and happiness in my heart.
My dreams will come true.
Every obstacle that I have encountered in my life is leading me to something better.
My true self will radiate outwards from the depths of my soul.
I regret nothing.
I will win.
Now, Reader, I am no where near close to where I want to be in my personal life. I battle with anxiety every day, and as discouraging as it can be at times, I refuse to retain a negative outlook on myself, and neither should you.